Take my hand and I will pull you through
The light is gone but I am still here with you
You are so far away thinkin’ you should roam
My arms are ready for you to come back home
Can you feel me, feel my reach?
Take it easy, honey, and just be.
from the song “The Reach” by Miranda Lee Richards
When difficult/bad/sad things happen in my life, I have a system in place. I acknowledge whatever the difficult/bad/sad thing is, shove it to the back of my mind into neat little compartments and go on my way. I’ve always done this and it’s worked just fine. This past year I’ve had more than my normal share of things occur and once again, I used my ‘system’ of dealing with everything and again, it’s been working just fine…or so I thought.
While at Oasis, during a talk Kim Klassen and Xanthe Berkeley gave, Xanthe showed a video she had made for One Day on Earth. I’d seen it before. Numerous times, in fact. But on that day while I watched it again, one of my neat, little compartments that I had shoved to the back of my mind cracked open and I began to cry one of those ugly, snot-nosed cries (Thank you, Siobhan Wolf, for the use of your shoulder that day).
I realized at that moment that I had stopped enjoying the most simplest of things in my life and had essentially been just existing. When I should have been celebrating all the little things in my life, I had been in a fog, waiting for the proverbial other shoe to drop, for the bad things to get worse. But you know what? That other shoe has not dropped and in watching that video made up of Xanthe’s gorgeous photos celebrating everyday life, I had an ‘aha’ moment. I realized that I could take what I had been shoving away, examine it a little closer, acknowledge it fully and then move on. I was going to be okay.
Thanksgiving is this week and my immediate family is no longer here. This saddens me greatly and once again I put my famous system back into place just like I’ve always had, but this morning while looking for something in my desk I came across a photo of my brother and grandmother, both of them tucked together in the very back of my desk drawer. I held them in my hand looking from one to another and at that moment, I let myself just be. I cried a little, but at the same time I knew that I was meant to find those photos. My brother has been gone 13 years and my grandmother 3 years. I’ll celebrate them this week and remember them lovingly, making their favorite Thanksgiving dishes to share with my husband and my boys and tell them stories of holidays past and when the day is done, I’ll feel blessed and full of love for all that I have…and just be.
Today, share with us those photos that move you and in celebrating the holiday this week remember to give thanks…and to just be.