Shutter Sisters

Self-Talk

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Of all the many ways we use words perhaps the most important are the ones we use to speak to ourselves.  The conversation we carry on in our own heads, day in and day out is the most intimate dialogue there is. No one else will ever hear the things we say to ourselves. This can make that dialogue either very sacred or very scary. 

Once, many years ago while suffering post partum depression, I scheduled a call with a highly-recommended energy worker/healer. Even before we began she revealed that it was actually paining her to have me on the phone because of the way I had been abusing myself. I didn’t know what she meant or what to say. Over the next few minutes I was made aware of how destructive my self-talk had become. Although at that time I would have called myself a perfectionist, I didn’t realize at what cost and all of the sudden there I was, called out by a perfect stranger. She had heard (even seen in some other-worldly way) the conversation I had going on in my head. It broke my heart. It really did. And it changed my life.

It’s taken me a long time to travel from then to now and a lot of courage to share it. It almost feels like another lifetime ago and yet it still stirs up intense emotion. Thankfully, over the years I have replaced almost all of those old words with the new ones filled with the loving self-kindness I deserve. The same ones we all deserve.

It seems to be coming in droves lately; all the compassion, nurturing, support, and encouragement is everywhere I turn affirming that it’s time to embrace the truth that we are all worthy of everything we long for.

What we do matters.

We are worthy now.

We are enough.

Today, I encourage you to be good to yourself. Listen to your own inner-voice. Are you treating yourself with the love and acceptance you so deserve? No one else can do it for you. You are the one you’ve been waiting for. You are enough.

If you are so moved, let your pictures help do the talking. Capture your own self-talk in a photograph. Hearing it or even reading it over and over can only be good.

Comments

  9. What fills my heart and reminds me constantly of who I am and my "enough-ness" is, the warmth of my husband’s embrace, the sound of his voice when he encourages me, the look of joy in my children’s eyes when they see me.

    And, being a positive influence in a young person’s life. Being an honest and encouraging teacher to a student, and watching them blossom.

    These things are filling my heart to overflowing, and I thank the Lord for it.

    http://nattysfamily.blogspot.com/2010/03/inspiration.html

  11. i just read this yesterday:

    Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
    Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.

    It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us.
    We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?
    Actually, who are you not to be?

    … the rest is here:
    http://www.2blessedbeyondbelief.com/2010/03/our-deepest-fear-is-not-that-we-are.html

    it reminded me of your post. in my current sadness and struggle, i’ve been seeking help from a mentor/counselor. she has been giving me a very similar message. to be kind to myself. to change the words i use to describe myself. where i would say undisciplined, she would say to use a different word. where i would say lazy, she would say it’s not laziness, rather fear of the unknown. she is really helping me see myself in a kinder light. that’s why i took this older self-portrait and titled it the way i did.
    http://www.flickr.com/photos/28567264@N05/4420421941/

  12. Wow.

    Thank you for your courage.

    I don’t have any photos to share, because I don’t think I’ve opened myself up yet to the vulnerability required to photograph this idea, much less the words to talk about it as it refers to myself. Or to those I love, for that matter.

    I always feel like I take the first step, only to slide backwards about six giant leaps. How does one begin with success? How do you make the new habits stick?

  13. What amazing words…that can push you into a moment you have waited so long for. I have been reading this blog for over a year…never to comment…fear my photos and creativity are not worth sharing…and yet now feel compelled to take the leap. I have a project…I take a photo a day…I feed people in need…that is worth something…thank you for the push.
    Rachelle

    http://www.onemindfulact.com/blog

  14. thank you all so much for your heartfelt comments. each of you is brave for sharing. we are all brave for taking these things to heart.
    you are inspiring me to consider writing more in depth about the process over on the i am enough blog. this conversation is yet another prefect catalyst for the blog. thanks again everyone. i admire each and every one of you so much.