“In our culture, vulnerability has become synonymous with weakness and imperfect now means inadequate. We associate vulnerability and imperfection with emotions like fear, shame, and scarcity; emotions that we don’t want to discuss, even when they profoundly affect every aspect of our lives.
To reduce our feelings of vulnerability, we wake up every morning, put on our game face, and rarely take it off – even at home. We use invulnerability as a shield to protect us from uncomfortable emotions and struggles with anxiety and self-doubt. But invulnerability has a price.
Vulnerability is indeed at the core of difficult emotions, but it is also the birthplace of authenticity, courage, joy, love, belonging, accountability, innovation, inspiration, creativity, and spirituality. When we avoid or shut down vulnerability, we lose access to the experiences that give purpose and meaning to our lives.
If we want to change the way we live, love, parent, teach, lead organizations, and build communities, we have to start with a conversation about vulnerability and imperfection – this is where our story begins.”
With our celebration of imperfection this month, we are courageously telling our authentic stories. I’m so proud of us.
Today, lets share our vulnerable sides. We would love to see your images of tenderness, imperfection, and the poetry of vulnerability.
We are delighted to be giving away 2 two book/dvd sets (including the new book The Gifts of Imperfection, another gem, I thought It Was Just Me, and the awesome Hustle for Worthiness DVD) all from the amazing Brené Brown. All you have to do is leave a comment here between now and Saturday midnight EST to be included in the random drawing.
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Congrats to Jet and GwynnieB ; winners of this fab giveaway from Brene Brown!!
wendy says
wow, that sounds amazing!
vulnerability is indeed a scary place when you first go there… I don't like it much, myself! but I know I need to embrace it.
Trittoli says
Great! I'll be in.
If you know your vulnerability, you can reduce it and you can feel more power inside, i think.
ehm yes…you need to work hard for this.
giftsofthejourney (Elizabeth Harper) says
I went to a very vulnerable place in the link below and was given a gift in the followup that changed me forever.
http://giftsofthejourney.wordpress.com/2010/08/07/someone-in-evansville-indiana-has-the-ability-to-change-my-life/
Marcie says
I think sometimes expressing our vulnerabilities and then learning that we're not the only ones..is the most healing practice of all:
http://visionandverb.com/2010/09/days-of-awe/
Kat says
Beautiful words. Thank you both, Tracey and Brene, I so identify with what you wrote. I have experienced the same thing in my personal journey.
http://www.kateyeview.com/2010/08/light-and-dark-places.html
(If I have linked this post here before, I apologize. It just so perfectly matches your topic today!)
nic says
wow.. thanks for sharing this and posting a link in there.. I really really enjoyed watching the talk and also felt much better after hearing this ..
alison says
i am thankful for people so beautifully brilliant like brene brown for showing us the way to 'us'.
And Miles To Go... says
Although I am just beginning a personal journey to finding myself, I do find myself very vulnerable in the little I have shared, and yes, it is a bit scary for me too. I have recently purchased Brene's new book, and am looking forward to reading it.
marina says
thank you, Tracey, for this beautiful post and all the incredibly inspiring links!
I love how the photo you have chosen illustrates vulnerability, how it celebrates how delicate the petals are and how they open up to light, to life, despite, or better, while being delicate and vulnerable.
here's a link to a photo which makes me think of how I sometimes react when I feel vulnerable:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mar_s/5094077773/
thank you also for the chance to participate in this great giveaway!!!
CDScott says
My motto has been "Flawed is the new Perfect" for some time now. It works for me to let go of the "conquer all or else" approach. Thanks for introducing Brene Brown to me.
Angie Willis says
Wonderful quotation. Reminds me of an image consultant I went to once. She made a lot of "putting on your armour" each morning before you go out into the world. The advice was always to wear some sort of choker necklace to "protect your throat"! I think I'm more inclined to go with Rene's inspirational idea that vulnerability, like many other emotions, is part of our makeup and constantly trying to control or suppress these emotions is actually suppressing the authentic "Youness" your post yesterday referred to.
Stacie says
I learned to embrace vulnerability from my dog, Sadie. When she rolls over on her back, showing her belly, her vulnerability makes me involuntarily move closer to her…and I wondered if it was the same with me. So now, I "show my underbelly" so to speak, and I find that people react in such a way that enables them to get closer and more protective of you then if you "put on your armour" each morning as referenced by Angie above.
Tina says
Yes, vulnerability is behind my 'happy' mask, especially in these days while I trudge through the mud of sad, huge changes.
Only yesterday I uploaded a photo' that amazingly fits Brene's theme like a glove.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/greenhillphotography/5103538722/
Jill F says
Every single day when I come here, I either learn something or leave with something to think about all day. Thanks for that.
janet says
Lovely post, great blog and beautiful work. I think this image I took expresses vulnerability.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/25101045@N05/4902790358/
Lillian says
My very favorite sweet tenderness between my two little ones – they do it so often and I was so glad to have caught it on camera:)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/lillianclaire/4907395782/
camerashymomma says
yes! i'm knee deep in brene's words right now. they are so powerful and true. this quote of hers couldn't be more true and applicable to my everyday life right now. "When we avoid or shut down vulnerability, we lose access to the experiences that give purpose and meaning to our lives."
i recently wrote about her word choice, wholehearted, with a photograph of mine depicting vulnerability. http://meredithwinn.wordpress.com/2010/10/18/wholehearted/
jaimie says
thank you for these inspiring words. xo
pam says
I love near KC, wish I had been able to attend. Its gratifying to hear reasons and answers for some of our everyday struggles.
Barbi says
Love all your posts but this one has me really thinking. As one who wears her heart on her sleeve and usually told not to and feeling not so "right", it hit me recently that my game face is on way too much and needs to be put away. I will be checking out all the links and the authors books. Thanks!
jenifer says
I just ordered her newest book and look forward to diving in………
Beth says
This post is particularly timely for me as I struggle with the balance of protecting myself and letting others in. 3 years ago, I lost my fiance to cancer. Since then, I've been fighting people off for fear they will leave me, hurt me, lie to me, and utlimately die, leaving me alone again… Every day is a struggle. But I'm lucky to always be surrounded by love.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/14632491@N07/2880308161/in/set-72157625216792994/
Katherine says
The moment I became a mother I have been struggling to find myself..to be me – so that my beautiful daughters can grow up to say that they really knew their mother – no secrets, no lies, just truth. I think that is the only real way to be truly happy. Thank you for sharing and letting me share! xo
amy z says
Here's to a sea change in our culture, and a return to vulnerability and imperfectness and real, honest-to-goodness LIVING. I work hard every day to teach my daughter that not only is it okay to be imperfect, it's actually preferred. The messiness of a life well-lived and truly experienced…what could be better?
Meghan says
I love this from Brene: "perfection doesn't keep us from getting hurt, it keeps us from being seen."
AppleTree says
I am adding her talks to the ever-growing list of TED talks I need to review. Thank you.
melissa says
after two weeks of beautiful creative collaborations and honest, courageous storytelling, i am deep in vulnerability hangover. thank you for this exquisite offering, immensely timely for me personally. tracey and brenรฉ together makes me wild with gratitude…gracias.
Leslie @ {Tiny Wings} says
I've been trying to channel my inner Brenรฉ this week, when dealing with my sweet 10 year old daughter — who is already dealing with body image & societies expectations & perceived imperfections. *sigh* I need to learn to embrace my own imperfections better . . . and help my daughter realize that she's perfect "As Is". It feels like a battle of epic proportions, and has me feeling extremely vulnerable and tender at the moment.
Suki says
Sounds awesome! I love her talks. Embracing vulnerability is so important in a society where people shut down more and more.
Jennifer says
Two weeks ago yesterday, my 76-year-old mother-in-law fell and broke her femur. Even in her pain, she managed to call 911 and called me to come over and stay with her while paramedics arrived. I had to bring my two-year-old son, who adores his granny, with me, and he heard her cries of agony as they put her on the stretcher. The situation has been heartbreaking, to say the least.
Though they were vulnerable, they found comfort in each other:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/cardboardsea/5076468844/
Robert says
Well I'm a little perplexed about the vulnerability part because in order to be vunerable you have to be thinking about what everybody else is thinking and Frankly My Dear…I don't Give A Damn ๐ And I don't mean that in a frank, mean way…but all my life I have been different from my friends and family…because I REALLY don't care others think about ME. Don't get me wrong…I care loads about others and if they are happy, etc. But I have never made my decesions based on what others think…just don't. My husband often asks where this came from and I don't know what to tell him. I have never been afraid of going places, doing new things and/or meeting new people. While others in my familly live in fear of driving to new places, being late because people may look at them as they arrive, etc. Then they get irritated with me cause I'm like…who cares…let them look at me all they want. Kinda like the old saying…take a picture, it lasts longers. And if people want to gossip about me…have at it…I'm like…they'll talk about me today and someone else tomorrow…so glad I could oblige them and give them some entertainment. Life is just too darn short for me to give my power to others. I'm like the girl it Friend Green Tomatoes…Towanda ๐
Patricia Davidson says
Wonderful blog post and image! Thanks for sharing the link! Awesome talk on vulnerability!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/pddesigns/5066400894/lightbox/
Thanks for the opportunity to win ๐
Ellen says
So why are we so afraid to show our vulnerability? I shot this earlier this week, I don't know if it fits for anyone else or not, but it does for me! ๐
http://flic.kr/p/8LtViF
damiec says
I have followed through one of these links, and will do the rest later this evening. She is marvelous – thank you for sharing.
There is a vulnerability in my act of posting this image to my flickr page. It's quite imperfect, but I have come to accept that I am pleased with it nonetheless.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/22487105@N06/5104570365/
playcrane says
Here's an example of my being vulnerable.
http://playcrane.blogspot.com/2010/10/reflections-on-play-therapy-conference.html
I included a link to a post I did for Tracey's I AM ENOUGH collaborative.
Bettina says
WOW… just what I needed this morning! What a powerful post!!!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bettina2/5056094494/
Paula says
The courage to be vulnerable is marvelous to behold.
Michelle says
brene's works speak to my soul. I listen to her podcasts often and i am searching for courage in my own imperfection
Melissa M. says
Great post!
Ellen says
Oksy, I'm feeling particularly vulnerable lately and I'm NOT liking it – maybe Renee can help.
Leslie says
I just discovered Brene' Brown's work a couple of weeks ago and find it inspiring and amazing!
Corinna says
Aaaahhh… Vulnerability. I have embarked, in the past 10 days, on an experiment in feeling vulnerable and not running from it by launching my own photoblog for the first time. The emotions raised by just putting it out there and allowing some of my own thoughts and dreams to be exposed are almost as interesting to me as the process of taking the photos or doing the writing. But even though it's scary as hell, it's also thrilling in a I'm-in-a-roller-coaster-about-to-crest-the-top-of-a-hill-and-take-the-plunge kind of way. I feel more alive because of it.
http://www.birdwannawhistle.com
Breanne says
Brene always inspires me on her blog! I'd love to win.
Also, this image is BEAUTIFUL.
Melissa Jacks says
It's been a long year for me…full of feeling extremely vulnerable. So scary. But also full of huge amounts of growth. Thanks for this post. It inspired me to share a little…
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mollymelly/5105330104/
WorthIt! says
Thanks for sharing such a thought provoking post – you've got my wheels turning.
I'm sharing an image that, for me, captures the peace that can be found in vulnerability.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/52055227@N07/5104781251/
jag says
This self-portrait is from a couple of years ago, but it shares one of my paths to authenticity and vulnerability:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/jagspace/3061925501/in/set-72157615270935624/
I absolutely agree that Brenรฉ Brown's work is vital. I am drawn to it and would be THRILLED and honoured to receive one of her books…
xox
Jet Harrington says
Being a mother has opened my heart and soul to tenderness, vulnerability, and yes, imperfection, in ways I never imagined. I pictured myself with more children, always wanted more, but have had to accept – and along the way have learned to embrace – that I will only have the one child. What a treasure she is.
http://scatterbeams.aminus3.com/image/2010-09-25.html
Jess says
I've learned so much in keeping an eye open for "imperfection" this month.
http://the-old-nichols-farm.blogspot.com/2010/10/vulnerability.html
jessica says
Oh my i would love to win this. come on randomizer…make it my day!
kristin says
this has been a most tender imperfect week.
new unsettled waters of motherhood.
feeling raw.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/14811117@N02/5103114200/
Marcela says
I want it , I want it … I think that's my vulnerability…. impatience : (
It could lead you to miss pretty moments.
Jade Sheldon says
Because of my troubles with trying hard to be a perfectionist, I am constantly feeling vulnerable. Growing up, I never felt like what I did was good enough. I met my fiance though and he taught me a lot about relaxing and loving who you are.
Gwynnie B says
Without quirkiness, vulnerability, bad hair days, eccentric neighbors, or burnt popcorn, life would be boring, and oh too perfect. I embrace imperfections and that's just perfect with me!!!
Katrin says
I just listened to her at u tube and i am deeply touched!
Trude says
I definitely agree with what Brene says, and work towards getting rid of those old, silly associations every day. I was taught to be strong, to be tough, and took that lesson a little bit too much to heart! Feeling very grateful that I'm with someone who encourages me to be vulnerable, and to let people see it. This image, for me, expresses that a bit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/trudem/4928519270/in/photostream/
Ann says
I love this discussion, and the images. Thank you.
Diane says
I would love to read more…
bridge says
the fine art of accepting what is not perfect! I love.
kristal says
Feeling very vulnerable recently. Needed to read this right now. Thanks!
Brown says
I was privileged to be part Brene Brown's webinar this past Sunday night. Her work is important both in the field of addictions but in general.
Susan says
oops, misposted but I am NOT ashamed, just vulnerable. I was privileged to be a part of Brene Brown's webinar this past Sunday night. Her work is important both in the field of addictions and in general.
Susan
laurie hausler says
I very much enjoyed the video – I am so inspired by Dr. Brown's work! Thanks for the chance to win.
Rachelle says
I'm already a Brene fan and would love to read her books!!
beth says
i wouldn't miss the chance to win such an incredible gift….
as a new member of the "i'm an empty nester, now what" club….
this would be such an amazing, feel good, your life iis just beginning gift ๐
Nikki says
Great giveaway! ๐
Wendy says
I have never posted on here before, but I love all the comments-what a great group of women you all here! Here's to all of us!!!!
michelle says
Ah…yes. Vulnerability and authenticity…can't thank Brene enough for helping me embrace and fear not – all of my imperfections ๐ I can recognize more often now when I am feeling vulnerable and can be so much more gentle with myself because of this… Life is less scary and more of an adventure! Thank you Brene for the gifts of a lifetime (and beyond!).
Fourth Breakfast says
Heard Brene speak while she was out in the SF Bay Area. It was good to hear her validate that my own winding journey to myself is worth the tough times and the befuddlement of onlookers.
Becky R. says
Vulnerability. I know that word all to well. When I was bullied in school, I put up an invisible wall. I wouldn't do anything out of the ordinary because I was to afraid of what other people thought. Now my vulnerability is shown in my photos. I won't usually show anything that is unsual, morbid, or taboo. God himself knows that I have plenty of those.
And imperfection. I really feel that if you don't like what you see, too bad. Deal with it. However, if with photos and my strive to learn more, my imperfections can be perfect if I keep at it.
Example: I followed a squirrel in a cemetery for that perfect shot.
I saw the squirrel, shot it with the camera, and I wasn't happy with it. http://flic.kr/p/8MbQXv
Then I tried again. http://flic.kr/p/8MeTBo Ok, it is cute but I'm STILL not happy with it. In my eyes, it wasn't perfect.
So I tried another time. http://flic.kr/p/8MbQog
Yet another: http://flic.kr/p/8MbQ8V
http://flic.kr/p/8MeSR1 I'm about ready to give up. Then I saw him climb up a tree and I got this: http://flic.kr/p/8KEYtj
Abbie says
I love her blog and would love to win the books and DVD
Kristi says
This book looks amazing and inspiring and a perfect fit for my life right now. I need something that helps me embrace the imperfect perfection in me. Thanks for the opportunity to be inspired!
Jennifer says
Thank you for the words and the links… I would love to read and hear more of this brilliance!
Jeri says
If there were such a thing as cautious vulnerability I'd take it. There isn't. Being vulnerable means taking risks. But when those risks return long-lasting friendships, life long love, beauty from ashes, and watching your adult sons succeed even in faiilture (as you stayed out of it) – it's worth the vulnerability.
I love what's posted above. It's so beautiful. Thank youl
Sarah S. says
Vulnerability…..the birthplace of courage……wow the words ring so true….thanks for sharing
mama_marathoner says
I've just recently been introduced to Brene's work by a friend's random post on FB. I'm so happy I found her! So far, I've really liked what I've seen, and can't wait to get the books!
Therese DeMare says
I believe my Creator lead me to Brene Brown on u tube. I was so excited when I saw her on video that I posted it to my facebook. I am a third year student in social work and am currently taking research methods and enjoying it. I will be telling eveyone that I know about her video. I ran out yesterday and bought her book " The gift of Imperfection." I have been a perfectionaist all of my life and really am looking foreward to reading it. Thank you Brene Brown. I love you already. Terrie
Expressions says
Happened to run across "Expressive Photography" last week, couldn't stop thinking about it, so ended up ordering if from Amazon.com. Also took advantage of their Frequently Bought Together option, which includes "The Gifts of Imperfection". Now, after reading this post, I am even more excited to receive my order! And I'm looking forward to perusing your site further. Best wishes!
AnnGeeDee says
I have thorougly enjoyed her TED talks and I think eveyone should listen to her speak.
Selenatx says
I recently discovered Brene's new book and loved it!!! It has really spoken to my heart and mind. She's the bomb!!!
Heather Larson says
What a wonderful opportunity to learn more about the true gifts of being honest with yourself and others – the gift if imperfection. Thank you! I love your and Brene's blogs.
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